Rules of a scary movie

Ok I was watching alot a horror movies last couple of days... and we all have done it.. Go why the hell are they doing that.... so I came up with my own rules and ways to survive a horror move. Forget the scream shit... this is for real...

1: The most important... Never..Ever..ever split up... always stay together. There is strength in numbers

2: If ever on a road trip..never get off the interstate.. don't take shortcuts..make sure you are gased up, and you are with someone else on the trip who is packing a semi automatic weapon, and if all possible don't travel at night,  and make sure your vehicle is road worthy..Obey all traffic laws to avoid the corrupt sheriff who has the killer at home in his closet..

3: Always arm youself... why is it the bad guy is always the only one with a weapon. While you are hiding in that barn full of tools, saws, axes, and other shit might as well use it to defend yourself..

4: After you take the bad guy serial killer down, make sure he is dead before you walk away.. cut his head off, maybe a leg so he has to hop over to you... go for a fatality.You played Mortal Combat...Go video game on their ass

5: The creapy ass farm house in the middle of nowhere is not a place to look for help... nor is anywhere people are missing more than half their teeth or the people are too nice...This isn't candy land, so unless you want to end up as a pie be on your guard.

6: Guys---strange sluty girls all the sudden comes out of nowhere and wants to have hot and wild sex with you equals waking up without your weenie or maybe a kidney.

7: In case of ghost and stuff... well your fucked...your best bet is to leave the area they are haunting and hope they don't follow you or call the dudes from "Ghost Hunters" if time allows you too...


8: Don't go anywhere looking for ghost and shit.. your asking for it...

9: When running away..don't look back, and don't back yourself up in a corner...

10: Zombie movies.. don't fuck around... you been bit well you're fucked and if someone you know has been bit, put a bullet in them. Cut all emotional ties and go Resident Evil on some asses.. Have your zombie survival guide ready to go.. You never know these days when the shit will hit the fan..

Well there are 10 simple rules.. I'm sure I have left out some situations but you get the picture.. If you have common sense use the shit and don't get yourself killed...